AAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! We’re all gonna die!!!!!

The planet Mercury is going to smash into Earth and kill us all!! It’s hopeless!! We’re DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMED!!!!

Well, someday. Maybe. If the gravitational field of Jupiter is just right. You know, in theory anyway.