1. Single-handedly turned GOP from a party of lunatics and morons into a party of lunatics and morons plus a guy with a pickup truck.
2. As the newest member of the Senate, he is required by tradition to buy pizza for everyone on his first day in the chamber.
3. His daughters probably aren’t hookers, but his family is definitely a bunch of attention whores.
4. Saved Massachusetts the horror of having a diligent, competent, boring woman in national office.
5. His pickup truck has a sticker of Calvin peeing on Ted Kennedy’s grave
6. John McCain giggles every time he hears Brown say “Obamer”
7. Voted “Republican senator least likely to get caught picking up rough-trade homos at truck stop” by his peers
8. With the wave of his hand and the wink of an eye can spread rainbows all across America
9. His agent is already in negotiations with Sarah Palin for a porn video
10. Can’t wait to get to Washington to screw over all the people who voted for him.
Dear Harvey, Pete, Barry, Kevin, and every other weathermonkey on Boston-area TV: Enough is enough. The fucking blizzard was THIRTY-TWO YEARS AGO. It’s time to stop trotting out the same blurry videotape of cars stuck on Rt. 128 that is older than some of the people who are actually on your broadcast, just so we [...]
It’s going to be a long two months waiting for the iPad to actually ship so that all the tech bloggers and their hangers-on will stop writing so much speculative bullshit about iT and turn their attention iNstead to some other thing that’s going to Change Life As We Know iT. Since you cannot click [...]
Please, please, PUH-LEEZE stop talking about “What do we call the last decade?” Nobody could come up with an acceptable choice ten years ago, and nobody’s going to come up with one now. “Aughties” and “Naughties” are contrived and stupid, and so is the very idea that anything wraps up all nice and neatly into [...]
