I like to think that Bridget and I are not “Helicopter Parents”. Faced with the double-whammy of Charlotte being an only child AND having parents who started late, the odds are against her, but for the most part I think we try to resist succumbing to the modern urge to control every moment of our special snowflake’s existence. I say this because we had to go review Charlotte’s 504 plan at her school this morning, and the very idea that she even HAS a 504 plan makes me feel like we’re too overbearing. Schools use 504 plans for kids with all sorts of issues (in our case, ADHD), but it’s also a way for them to get meddling parents out of their hair by dazzling them with bureaucratic bullshit. The line between the two conditions is a little fuzzy, hence my own uncertainty.
So, this NPR blog post made me feel a whole lot better. It lists the five most common worries of modern parents,of which are completely and utterly ludicrous. They are:
- Kidnapping
- Snipers
- Terrorists
- Dangerous Strangers
- Drugs
The post also lists the five ACTUAL most-common ways children are hurt or killed:
- Car accidents
- Homicide by a known individual
- Abuse
- Suicide
- Drowning
The disconnect between the real and imagined dangers could scarcely be bigger. I presume that you, like I, see the giant hand of media manipulation here, but if not, let me suggest that to you. Our society as a whole has completely lost sense of perspective of the difference between real and imagined threats to our daily safety, and our willingness to credulously accept whatever story the media would like us to believe is far too great. The latest strip from Tom Tomorrow sums it up neatly:
He’s a little more focused on the recent insistence by the media that a certain President of the United States is a Scary Black Muslim Terrorist, but on any given day the same narrative is routinely applied to schools, bedbugs, lawn chemicals, unscrupulous dry cleaners, and Justin Bieber.
With so much random fear-mongering, it’s really no wonder that the current model for parenting is the “helicopter parent”. Sadly, you can’t get rid of so much misplaced fear with status meetings and classroom modifications, so it’s no wonder there’s so much mutual frustration between schools and parents.
Yes, fear-mongering producers have no trouble dredging up sound bites to scare viewers.
Usually cops, state’s attorneys, or other law enforcement who need to get more federal funding – ala the same crowd that thinks censoring Craigslist will stop prostitution.
Fresh Air had an interesting segment on how people believe what they want to believe even when confronted by the facts. It was Terry Gross on Fresh Air I think.
<3 NPR! (and dern tootin' I'm a member!)
Hi there. I’m (much) older than you – so not sure I understand the term Helicopter Parent. Is that the type parent who hovers over their kids? Always into their stuff, etc.? Yeah, maybe I DO know what it means, huh?
Anyway – I know you touched on a lot of other stuff in this post, but I want to reassure you on your kidlet. No matter what the school says or what the 504 says (I’ve had grands on those) YOU are her parents. Be her best supporter and her first defender. After all, you are responsible (financially, morally, physically) for her and what she does. So – get in the school’s face if need be.
That’s not helicoptering . . . that’s parenting. :)
stepping off my gramma soap box for now. Nice to meet you (fb), btw. Seems we share some friends I’ve “known” for years. Love how the interwebs make the world so much smaller, eh?
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