1. Denying that the Holocaust ever happened is perfectly okay, as long as you say it in Latin.
2. Being a drug smuggler, on the other hand, will get you kicked out on your ass. But, don’t worry, because our secret tribunal really isn’t a torture chamber…any more…
3. Only His Holiness will determine which pieces of toast REALLY have pictures of Jesus on them, and which ones are fake. Plus, we want a 5% finder’s fee on anything you sell on eBay that even remotely looks like anyone.
4. Facebook is bad…really, really bad. But YouTube is where the action is, kids, so come watch my videos and vote them up-up-UP!
In Nomine Patri et Fili et Spiritu Sanctu, Amen.
