Kansas Whine

“Auntie Em, don’t let her take Toto!”
Vs.
If you must wear this cool swim cap, do remember to avoid zombies. (thanks, Gigi!)
Kansas Whine

“Auntie Em, don’t let her take Toto!”
Vs.
If you must wear this cool swim cap, do remember to avoid zombies. (thanks, Gigi!)

Via Gael at Pop Culture Junk Mail comes this link to a piece in Time Magazine by Joel Stein wherein he, his wife, and popular wine critic Gary Vaynerchuk sampled and critiqued 50 wines, one from each state in the U.S.
It’s interesting to discover that there is apparently at least one winery in every state of the Union. Many of them do not have their own vineyards, they buy the grapes and then make their own blends of juices to produce whatever varieties of wine they hope to sell. Quite a few make wine from fruits other than grapes, and in those cases they do indeed often grow their own fruit. Most of the wineries only sell their products locally. Stein doesn’t say how they managed to choose the wines they sampled, or why one winery might have been chosen over another, so the rankings that he ends up with need to be viewed as only being representative of the particular wines involved and NOT the quality of winemaking in each state.
I tell you this because one of the wines they deemed “undrinkable” came from Massachusetts (see the image above). The wine, a blend of Cabernet Sauvignon and Cabernet Franc called “Nobksa Red” comes from the Cape Cod Winery in Falmouth. But there are half a dozen or so wineries in Massachusetts, at least one of which I know produces some excellent wines.
Here’s an interactive gallery of all the wines they tried. You can click on each bottle for a closeup image and a short review of that particular wine, and you can also display them grouped by their ratings (excellent, good, bad, and undrinkable). One of their favorites was a Muscat from Jewell Towne Vineyards in New Hampshire, only about a half an hour’s ride from our house. They also make a port and a couple of different varieties of eiswein (ice wine). I think I’ll have to go check them out sometime.

Well here’s a new twist on buying wine online: AccidentalWine.com is sort of like the fire-damage department store chain of wine. They buy product that has such merchandising no-nos as damaged labels, out-of-date brnading elements, or other minor defects that do not affect the quality of the wine but do make the bottles unsuitable for conventional retail sale. Then they sell it online at discounted prices. If it works for TJ Maxx, it should work for them, right?
There are a couple of things to pay attention to, though. The first is that you don’t get to choose what wines you buy. They’ve very vaguely organized the wines they sell into three categories based on three sets of “tastes”, but the tastes aren’t even defined by readily identifiable styles such as “Big Reds” or “Citrusy Whites” or by region. One says “…very good wines with reputation and breeding but old fashioned pricing…”, another says “…great wines from around the world as one who appreciates the artistic works of great winemakers…”, and the third says “…great wines with good value, because the doctor (smart guy) demands I drink a glass of wine everyday. These prices help my budget.” That third category in particular makes me think of Two-Buck Chuck, but those are kinda fuzzy ways to identify wines. So you pick which categoy you prefer, and they send you a case (or as many as you want to buy, I guess) of whatever they have that fits that description. Kind of like telling a car dealer “I want something blue that seats four” and letting him decide whether he’ll give you a 2008 Mercedes or a 1953 Buick. At least with this wine thing, you *can* specify white, red, a mix, or a “surprise me” case.
Also note that “discount” does not mean “cheap”. You want Two-Buck Chuck, go to Trader Joe’s. A shipment of three bottles is $67.00 (not including S&H). That means you’re paying a little over $22 per bottle. The webite says that the average retail price of the wines they sell in the 3-packs is $84/bottle, so that is a pretty steep discount off the original price. Unless I’m buying a bottle for a special occasion, though, my typical price point for wine is more in the $12 range. I probably would try this with the hope that I would get some really nice wines for a price that isn’t totally out of my league, but if you’re not among the adventuresome wine drinkers, you might think twice.
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